December 2020 - EKAANTANANDA

Life is short , live your dreams..

Chase your happiness, you deserve it ..

Let the World preach , Its my Life ! ..

Why so serious ?

This is what they tell me. This has given me that sense of self worth. These daily quotes give me that daily push. These ads. I love them. They care so much for my happiness. Whatever my mind says, they deliver . I feel like the center of the Universe. I walk on this planet like a King. All its resources and beings -living or non living are tools to further my existence. My life has only one rule , one ethic- The Pursuit Of Happiness. My freedom , my rights are paramount. I am the worthiest. This is what “they” say , they can’t lie. My sensory sojourns are taken care of by them . I am full. Never deprived.

I know my time is limited. I will ensure I “use” and consume it fully. Whatever I need , is up there in that catalogue. Everything from the tiniest atom to the loftiest visible object , all exist to make my life better here. I am worthy. They keep telling me .

One thing haunts me though. Why do I become serious sometimes? When it comes to those unpleasant times? Why can’t I be nonchalant then too? What is that I fear losing in those times? If life is a joke, why can’t I laugh at my miseries? Why don’t those ads seem pleasant during those times? They say all I need is a lot of stuff. I have it. And “they” are always there to load me with more stuff and “happiness”. But why do I get serious when things don’t go my way?

They tell me that there have been some extraordinary non-serious people like Guru Nanak, Kabir Das, and Meera Bai. They tell me that the more they lost, the happier they became. The more they gave, the fuller they felt. What was that brand of non-seriousness? Why don’t they show it in the ads? Weren’t those people advised by their minds and adversities to “go for it” and “get” what they deserved and wanted?

white birds flying — (Photo by Hakan Tahmaz on Pexels.com)

Probably they did what they wanted, just as I am doing. But they were not serious. Even I am not. It’s just that I get ruffled easily and “they” rush to make me OK again. But I do suffer. Those non serious people soared over the sea of suffering. I would love to soar too, learn their brand of non-seriousness someday and embrace their carefree mode of existing.

Even as these questions arise , I can see that “they” are coming. They tell me that the World’s economy runs on my happiness. They can go to any extent to cheer me up. They are always working on that. They have toys for every occasion. Whenever I become serious or turn inward, they present a new toy which keeps me sane and practical. They tell me real detachment is about staying away from those tough questions which pop up when suffering strikes.

Those fakirs must have been really weird people. Who can stay in joy just like that ? Without any help from “them” ? Their non seriousness must be a myth. Mine is real. The purpose of Life is to chill. Time to see my therapist and then I am off for shopping. I can’t stay serious for long.

Without duality , there is no perception of the “other”.

Cause- effect, knower-known, observer-observed, speaker-listener, and so on.

Talking of listening, the seemingly innocuous process involves so many things. Making some space in your mind to register the words thrown at you, making some sense of what is being said, and retaining the essence of those words(assimilation).

While a mother can listen to a child’s mind from miles away, the truth is that we have so many speakers but few listeners.

Not listening properly is fraught with dangers:-

You missing out on details
The speaker getting agitated at your inability to respond as expected
The conversation taking an unintended turn

Why don’t we listen? Because our minds are occupied by other more interesting, attractive, and “useful” thoughts. You try to keep the background noise alive by courteously giving the speaker the attention deserved. The process involves acting, nodding, and repeating the keywords. Obviously, this leads to incoherent and incomplete understanding.

On top of everything, you are driven so much by your conditioning and prefixed notions that you listen to the person and not the speech. You even have a set conclusion running in the background. You are just waiting for the speaker to stop and confirm your theory, and getting relief from the mild pain between your brows.

Ironically, the era of staying connected has led to disconnected relationships and conversations. The attention span is already very low, the technology more trustworthy than its creator. You expect the speaker to talk using keywords and hashtags and two-minute clips. Shouldn’t we go back to the cave era and start to communicate using drawings?

Unless the listening improves, the energy drain will continue. So much will continue to be spoken without effect. There will be futile presentations and a sleeping audience. Those incomprehensible, seemingly deep, and never-ending “couple” calls will go on forever with no conclusion obviously. The meetings will keep ending with resolutions “to meet again”, with the hope that finally the “one” who actually listens comes up with a breakthrough.

But why are talks inconclusive? Among many factors, one is both parties trying to force their way through the opposition’s mind while simultaneously blocking any rival views from entering their own. Why do people need to go to experts who “listen”? Because they hope that by paying them they earn a right to a dignified hearing. And that is what satisfies a human. Being heard and understood.